The Questions I Ask Myself (repost). . .

I hope you all had a great St. Paddy's. Be kind to yourself today, won't you? I am taking it easy after cooking a big meal for a large number of people and then doing the dishes afterward late into the wee hours. Not exactly a wild night on the town, but I'm really old and require huge amounts of sleep to function. In fact, I think I will take a nap soon.

After I wake up, I'm going to finish some important writing projects that I've let slide. I'm reposting a piece I wrote at the beginning of my blogging career. Hard to believe that was just a couple of months ago.

Have an awesome March 18th! And thanks for your help and support.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

This is what I think about when I'm sitting at my computer, a solitary being in search of company yet finding none. I don't have a story idea in my head, my Facebook home page has zero friends chatting, my email inbox is so bare it reminds me of an old West ghost town just before the big gun fight. Even the occasional spam I receive from the obscure catalogue company I purchased something from eons ago wants nothing to do with me.

In other words, I've got zilch, nada, rien, nichts...

I ask myself the great, profound WHY on such occasions. (These are also some of the questions I ask myself when I am sleep deprived or if Winter has gone on too long and the stir-crazies have set in.)

1. Why does "seven minute" icing take so much longer than seven minutes to make?

2. Why do I talk to the television or my dog or the refrigerator when I know they're not really listening?

3. Why do I take offense at blonde jokes when I'm not even naturally a blonde?

4. Why does my crummy vacuum NOT suck?

5. Why doesn't anyone else notice when I'm having a good hair day?

6. Why do I love to watch the Food Network when I hate to cook?

7. Why does my dog love my husband? (P.S. He never wanted her in the first place.)

8. Whatever happened to Mrs. Clean? Or for that matter, the Burger Queen?

9. Why do I assume my children will take a hint?

10. If you leave your heart in San Francisco, does it really matter where the rest of you goes?

11. Why do I check the fat grams in Krispy Kremes?

12. If we all wore sunglasses, would we still see eye to eye?

13. Does the Postmaster General oppose the war?

14. Why don't they have Queen-size candy bars?

15. Why do they say black swimsuits are slimming when I weigh the exact same amount after putting one on?

16. Why do middle-aged people not look so old to me now?

17. Why don't grocery stores have a Coin Star for Legos or Hot Wheels? (I'd be rich!)

18. Who invented the word Google?

19. Why do medication disclaimers sound worse than the original disease?

20. Why do my children think that an ironic twist is a wedgie from a younger sibling?

There they are...those embarrassing, unanswerable questions I sometimes think about. If they serve no other purpose, they at least remind me to smile and remember that life isn't always so serious and duty-filled. It is often absurd and laughable. That's a good thing to remember when we live in the times we do. As they say, "Keep that sense of humor!" Maybe days like this are beneficial if they help me keep my perspective. And give me a free moment to listen to my six-year-old playing with his action figures in the next room.

Every gray cloud has a silver lining, right?

(Or maybe two.)